The Aftermath of Trauma

Understandably, talking about trauma is tricky for numerous reasons. Many survivors of trauma will go through the trials and tribulations, the dark and thorny places, and experience cycles of flashbacks, anxiety, panic, rage, depression, hopelessness, shame, emotional and physical withdrawal, a barrage of external and internal triggers, and more.

What is the Role of Family and Friends?

Exposure to and the experience of trauma has been a part of the human condition since we evolved as a species, but there continues to be a societal paralysis in both the understanding and conversation following human trauma and community violence.The lasso of trauma not only impacts the survivor, but their roles and relationships: spouse/partner, parent-child, sibling, extended family and kinship, and the family as a whole. Often family and friends don’t fully understand “what happens next” or know how to create a conversation with survivors about her/his needs and provide the safe space for their pain and suffering (mental & physical) to be seen. What’s important now is for the family to practice patience, understanding, compassion, and allow ample time and space for healing and grief. As part of the supportive network, family and friends can:

As part of the supportive network, family and friends can

Educate yourself about PTSD and the aftermath of trauma

Trauma is complex! Never minimize or invalidate a survivor’s traumatic experiences by simplysaying they will get over it

Accept there may be changes in relationships as “everyone” navigates through the healing process

Anticipate and manage not only the survivor’s triggers, but yours as well

Acknowledge the survivor’s strengths and ability to survive

You may also need to plan for crisis situations. Seek help if the survivor is suicidal

Prioritize self-care and seek outside professional support, including cultural and spiritual healing practices

Remember you are never alone

Let go of the impulse to give advice – the act of listening attentively is powerful

Less Fixing, More Listening